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Zombie Jokes for Children (with FREE printable lunchbox jokes!)

September 6, 2023
Homeschooling Blogs

Halloween is a time full of treats and fun! These Zombie jokes for kids will have the whole family laughing. There are 31 jokes so you have one for each day of October! 

You can also download free printable jokes at the bottom of this post. They work great as fun lunchbox jokes or just as another way to share them with your family!

Zombie Jokes

Q: Why did the zombie quit his teaching job?
A: He only had one pupil left.

Q: What do you call zombie twins?
A: DEAD ringers.

Q: What time do zombies wake up in the morning?
A: Ate o’clock.

Q: Who do Cowboy zombies fight?
A: The DEADskins.

Q: What does a zombie get when he’s late for dinner?
A: The cold shoulder.

Q: Why did the zombie go nuts?
A: He lost his mind.

Q: Why did the zombie forget to go to the meeting?
A: Because he was brain dead.

Q: In what way are zombies like computers?
A: They both use megabites.

Q: Where do zombies go to vacation?
A: The DEADiterranean.

Q: Who won the zombie race?
A: Nobody – it was a dead heat.

Q: How do zombies greet their dinner guests?
A: They say, “pleased to eat you!”

Q: What kind of candy do zombies hate most?
A: Life Savers.

Q: What kind of car do zombies drive?
A: Monster trucks.

Q: Why was the zombie left-handed?
A: Because his right arm dropped off!

Q: What do zombies consult to find out their futures?
A: Horror-scopes!

Q: Why did the Zombie join the army?
A: He heard they give out arms.

Q: Why didn’t the zombie get the acting role?
A: They wanted someone more lively.

Q: What did the zombie order at the fast-food restaurant?
A: A quarter brainer and fries!

Q: What do you call a zombie who’s eating brains?
A: A no brainer!

Q: What is black, white & dead all over?
A: A zombie penguin.

Q: Why did the zombie comedian get booed off the stage?
A: Because all the jokes he told where rotten.

Q: Which is a zombie’s favorite room in a house?
A: The living room!

Q: How do you know a zombie is tired?
A: He’s just dead on his feet.

Zombie Dad Jokes

Q: When do you see the most zombies?
A: Halloween.

Q: Why did the zombie go crazy?
A: He had lost his mind!

Q: Why didn’t the zombie get the job?
A: They wanted someone more lively!

Q: What does it take to become a zombie?
A: Deadication.

Q: What do you call a bite from a cold zombie?
A: A frostbite!

Q: What was the zombie’s favorite toy?
A: His Deady bear.

Q: What did one zombie say after eating a comedian?
A: This tastes funny.

Q: Do zombies eat brains with their fingers?
A: Nope – they eat the fingers separately.

Printable Zombie Jokes

Printable Zombie Jokes for Kids

Be sure to download your FREE zombie jokes printable jokes. You can print these jokes to leave around the house or surprise your kids in their lunch box!


More Halloween Jokes

If you’re looking for more great jokes for October, check out some of these for more good laughs!

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